White House Horse Dies Suddenly

Nov 21, 2018

A beloved white house horse suddenly died today, just a few moments after this photo was taken.

How did such a healthy young horse suddenly pass?  It’s a sad mystery indeed.

According to vets, the most common cause of sudden death in horses is a ruptured heart.  Perhaps it had an aneurysm in its aorta, which predisposed it to rupture as blood pressure increases during exercise.

Except... it wasn’t exercising.  It was peacefully standing there, enjoying being dressed nicely in its favorite holiday outfit as Trump slowly approached, reached out, and stroked his presidential fingers across its chest cavity.

I guess we’ll never know what happened.