Reality Adjustments

Who is Pope Francis? A Dossier Roast

Jan 20, 2019

Motto: I will humbly modernize Catholicism to honor the universal god of love within us, while pretending not to

Flaw: 2000+ years of genocide, pedophilia, crusades, gold

What Can Save Him: Women popes

Alternate Reality: Floor scrubber at a Wild West boom town brothel

Most Likely Outcome: Gets into Heaven, finds it all quite gay, especially the colors and interior design

The Tilted Glass