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NASA Will Send Aliens to Earth by 2020

NASA has announced its next space shuttle mission.

“We're sending our resident aliens to invade Earth,” said NASA spokesperson, Gary Jupiter.  “Mostly they'll come, hover ominously for a few days, blot out the sun, and scare people with threats of anihilation.  Then whoosh disappear!  It’s going to be sweet.”

The controversial move...

Stephen Hawking Going Through a Hole Phase

The world-renowned British theoretical physicist—known for his contributions to the fields of cosmology, general relativity, and quantum gravity—has gotten really into Hole lately.

“I love the shape of her mouth as she screams,” he said in an exclusive interview with The Tilted Glass.  “So circular.  Love has this sweet but bad vibe. ...

"Drugs" Check Into Drug Rehab Clinic

The entire global pharmaceutical industry today has checked into an addiction treatment center in Orange Country.

“Our little Drugs has picked up a trillion dollar-habit,” said its concerned mother and father from Austin, Texas.  “I don’t know how it happened.  It just kind of blew up.”

Drugs has been in the...

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