Gay CERN Scientists Discover New Sexual Category

Jun 08, 2019

It happened during pride month.  At the Skoliosexual Laboratories outside of CERN, agender ally Roman Smith was researching the cause of different sexual, romantic & spiritual attractions.

Their team of transgender pansexual physicists and demisexual-demiromantic lipstick lesbian botanists were researching the bicurious patterns within cisnormativity, when they found a new category of attraction fluidity.

It happened when a T2F2M2T gender non-conforming intern spilt double helix glitter over a Venus Fly Trap that had been placed in the CERN superconductor.

A constellation of aromatic aromantic drag queens quickly rushed to the scene, but to no avail.  A new quantum spin of the Venus Fly Trap produced a poly gender variant worth questioning.

They discovered that the light-glitter DNA of gene inheritance which affects expression, now freed from the closet of heteronormative conditioning, produced a Venus Fly Trap that did not repel flies but attracted other Venus Fly Traps.

But there’s more.  Now called a Venus Venus Trap, the double Venetian bind curiously bonded to the blood of humans.  This blood enters the human sexuality stream and produces a version of expression called The Trap.

The Trap has been known to trigger all sorts of anti-pro-anti-pro alignments.  It can even make a penguin fly.  Might you have The Trap?  Have you been Trapped?  There may be no way out, but luckily yes, Gravity’s Rainbow: this is not a disentanglement from, but a progressive knotting into.