Reality Adjustments
 

Comrades! We’ve Borrowed Chinese Money to Fund Our Military!

Mar 29, 2019

Comrades, it is I, Czar Donald Trump, commander of the largest socialist army in the world! The U.S. Military!  кричать ура!

I am pleased to announce that the U.S. debt to China is $1.13 trillion as of 2019.  Thanks for funding our government, Chairman Mao!

We are using that Chinese money to fund our great military.  Now one day China will want their money back… but we’ll say no!  Hey China: Don’t you know we bought weapons with your money?  We’ll shoot you with the guns bought by your money, so we don’t have to pay you back your money.  Ha!

But most of our military’s $600 billion a year budget is funded by you, the capitalist working class.  Although I’ve slashed public welfare, I keep taxing you so we can police the world in an endless war.  The money we take from you shall build a Great Communist Wall!  Screw you, capitalist workers!

Looking for a way out of of this capitalist rat hole?  We have 1.3 million soldiers in active duty that enjoy the fruit of communism every day.  Enlist, and we'll give you free healthcare, housing, food, education, and a brotherly and sisterly bond unseen by capitalist scum.

The ruling class is the communist party!  The communist party gives back to the ruling class!  Your taxes go to the state and wealthy estates.  Ha!

So what shall it be, my dear proletariats?  Will you suffer by the iron fist of unchecked capitalism?  Or will you join hands with our military and have the state provide for you?

The answer lies in the unclenching of your open palms!

America!

The Tilted Glass