Let's Punish Litterers by Chopping Off Their Fingers

May 26, 2019

Call me old fashioned.

Yesterday I saw a man toss a piece of trash out the window.  As if that’s ok. Just “Hey I finished my plastic garbage, now I'll throw it out of my douchebag car and onto the street."

Fines don't work.  There is something fundamentally flawed with those who litter.  Luckily, there’s a perfect method of punishment available to us.  It's called: Off with his hand.

We would give first time offenders a warning.  But afterwards, begin with a fingertip.  Then a finger.  And slowly move through the body, limb by limb, until nothing is left but a stump, a gutted stump like the stump of The Giving Tree that gave until its deforested end.

The Eighth Amendment of the United States Constitution states: “Excessive bail shall not be required, nor excessive fines imposed, nor cruel and unusual punishments inflicted.”

But we already break this amendment with excessive classist bails and cruel punishments like the death penalty.

But the cruelest punishment of all is to destroy our planet.  You destroy the planet, you destroy the ecology of life.

So call me old fashioned, but off with his hand!