Reality Adjustments

How to Donate Your Car (to Jay Leno)

Jan 18, 2018

Jay Leno’s car collection is one of the richest in the world.  It consists of about 136 automobiles and 90 motorcycles.  It is worth approximately $50 million and includes such top pieces as a 2014 McLaren P1 ($1.35 million), a 1955 Mercedes 300SL Gullwing Coupe ($1.8 million), and a custom made 2006 EcoJet (priceless).

But let's say you want to donate your piece of junk broken down jalopy to the legendary comedian.  Seems like an impossible task?  Don't worry.  The Tilted Glass is here as always to help you out.

On a side note, most charities post instructions on how you can donate your car to help their cause.  Your donation can help animals, children, the arts, medicine, and veterans... all while also giving yourself a write-off.  It’s a win-win.  For example, here are links to the car donation pages for Doctors Without Borders and UNICEF.

But you are here because you don't care about those charities.  You care about donating to Jay Leno.  First off you must understand that he is not soliciting your 1988 Honda Accord.  Nor does he want your 2003 Chevrolet Spark.  He doesn't want your boat.  He doesn't want your scooter.  He doesn't want any of your possessions actually.

So now is the time to be clandestine. You must drive into his neighborhood and ditch your 1993 Toyota Corolla on the public street along with a hand-written note that says “A gift for you, Mr. Leno.”  Eventually a tow-truck will come and impound your vehicle.  From there you will have to pay hundreds of dollars to get it back.  Then you can try again, and again, and again.  

Eventually you will surely gain the notice of Mr. Jay Leno.  He’ll ask “What’s it going to take for you to stop doing this?”  Once you explain your life story over tea and biscuits, he will be so inspired that he will start his own charity called: The Jay Leno Charity to Help the Needy and Get You to Stop Giving Me Your Car like a Creep.  Once the paperwork clears for his charity, you can then donate your car directly to him.

If you don't have the patience, recall that Jay Leno once donated his 2012 Fiat 500 Prima Edizione to the Fisher House Foundation, which builds comfort homes for the families of military members receiving medical treatment at military hospitals and VA Medical Centers.  You could also donate to The Fisher House through v-dac at this link here.

Happy donating!

The Tilted Glass