NRA Encourages Blacks, Gays, Feminists & Muslims to Take Up Arms

Jul 27, 2019

BREAKING NEWS: Today the NRA has issued the following statement:

To our fellow patriotic Americans:

The Second Amendment means everything to us.  Without it, the NRA would be nothing.  We’d have to go out and get jobs.

As it says in the constitution, a well-regulated militia is essential to this country’s freedom.

We take up arms to defend ourselves against grave threats.  We carry guns to protect our liberties from violent oppressors.

But in America today there are many grave threats facing gays, women, people of color, and people of Islamic faith.

White supremacy is on the rise.  The police are disproportionately shooting people of color.  The LGBTQ community faces hate crimes.  Islamic practitioners are being targeted for just for exercising their freedom of religion to pray.

The heartland of America is having a heart attack.  So this is why we at the NRA officially encourage all gays, blacks, women, and non-Christians to take up arms.  Protect yourselves against the oppression of majority rule.  Protect yourselves against WASP America.

The NRA is here to remind you that guns, massive amounts of guns, in the hands of Muslim Americans and Americans of color are what will Make America Great Again.  

And white people: Just know: They are coming for you.  They are coming after your families and children.  They are coming after you with guns.  They think you are the enemy. 

Oh how the Lord and savior of the NRA shall fan the flames of demographic discrimination.  Guns shall liberate us all from guns.

Sincerely,

The National Rifle Association